I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
