I showed him my bush... on skype.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
