I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
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