Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
There's always time for handjobs
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
The Olympian is in my bed
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Randomize
