just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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