She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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