I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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