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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?

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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Tie

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• (706): View more from Georgia

  Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.

  (1-706): View more from Georgia

  Well thats $24,000 well spent.

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'

  (740): View more from Ohio

  i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.

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• 

  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (734): View more from Michigan

  How was the bike ride?

  (1-734): View more from Michigan

  Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.

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• (313): View more from Michigan

  I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.

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• (770): View more from Georgia

  That would warm my breasts.

  (770): View more from Georgia

  In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.

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• (315): View more from New York

  i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy

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• 

  These 23 People Share the Worst Advice They’ve Been Given

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS

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• (573): View more from Missouri

  The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.

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• (530): View more from California

  My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?

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• (712): View more from Iowa

  also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going

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• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you

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