is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
My pussy is not your playground.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Randomize
