I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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