I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
