lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
