If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Randomize