yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Ladies don't puke and tell
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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