Are we in a gay sports bar?
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
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