I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
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