some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
