Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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