You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
