pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
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