Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
