this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I think I sprained my soul last night
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Randomize