her vagine was all disorganized.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
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