spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
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