I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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