Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
