i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
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