What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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