Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
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