Non-Jews are for practice
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
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