found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
