Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
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