I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize
