you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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