i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
