peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Randomize
