i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Randomize