hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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