Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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