mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Randomize
