Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
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