DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Randomize
