you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Randomize
