Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
