I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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