Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
