i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
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