So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize
