Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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