Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
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I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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