Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
