Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Randomize
